“Yellow Flat Hair” by April Boddie

 

I can remember like it was yesterday when my number one hopped in the car and stated, “I want flat yellow hair.”

At first I was a little confused. Yellow? Flat? 

But as my eyes began to focus in on the sweaty, shiny, beautiful, curly fro, it all made sense. The look in her eyes told me her level of seriousness and it broke my heart! See Evaughna was a Kindergarten student at Whitesburg Elementary, which was 80% or so white. There weren’t a lot of little brown babies and at the time there were no mixed babies. In walks sweet unique Evaughna with a lisp. Father Italian mother Unapologetic African American.  Her afro practically breathed it was so big and beautiful. Flat hair was just not naturally in her future.  So it was my duty to teach her to love every curl on her head. We pulled onto the road and off to Books A Million we went.

Books A Million was place that Evaughna was very familiar with due to the fact that her Mom loved books, quotes, and words. We asked the clerk if she had any books on the subject of ethnic hair care. She pointed us in a precise direction where surprisingly there were several books on that exact subject. My heart leaped when I saw “Happy To Be Nappy”.

It was a hard cover book with all things curl! All things black, brown, and fluffy. This cute little book reflected all the characteristics that I needed it to for such a time as this. It was illustrated with minimalistic water colors and children that abstractly looked like her and me!  I read the book to her right there where we stood. When I finished it her bony chess stuck out like a superhero. I saw a purpose and pride in her teary bright brown eyes.

We raced home and washed her hair and, over the course of the next month, I reread that book at least 20 times. By the end of that school year I mimicked every hair style at least once. With every style and flip of the page our bond strengthened and with every style her unique strong personality was formed.

That little girl I speak of is now a 21-year-old Airwoman who is keenly aware of who she is. She is still quirky and quite unique. I would have it no other way. She remembers her Kindergarten year and, yes, she recalls the bullying, but her fond memories of self discovery far outweigh any other light affliction. The rejection gives her the kindest, sweetest spirit for the underdog and a fight for the weak.

My fondest memory, however, was at the end of the school year. By now several girls had tried to copy her many hair styles. Unfortunately, they were unsuccessful due to the unique texture of her mulatto hair. She quietly noticed their efforts but never said a cross word about it. When she got in the car on the last day she said in her squeaky voice with the Cindy Brady lisp, “Mommy I love my hair!” To that I replied, “ain’t nothing wrong with that, high five!”

Some of you may be struggling to fit into this vain, regurgitated world right now. After all, in popular demand are fake butts, veneered teeth, filled in eyebrows, acrylic nails, pounds of make up, and most of all, fake/borrowed personas.

I never thought that I would live to see this shallow, sad day. Take heart my friends, you don’t have to fit in. You were created to stand out! You might not ever be able to be the person that “they” want you to be so just be you. Be U tiful U! You do a heck of a you so never be ashamed to be that.

An original masterpiece, a unicorn is what you are.

You will be too much or too little for some people, but can I tell you a secret? Those are not your people! So before you desire something that is genetically or emotionally impossible to have, you go and look at that beautiful, flawed reflection in the mirror and tell yourself, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and God don’t make no junk!”

God loves you just the way you are but never use that as an excuse not to get better.

Live, love and grow.

As you grow, you will see that the only person you are competing with is the person that you were last year or the year before.

Learn how to love you, all of you, even the mistakes. Because in the great words of Dr. Seuss:

BE WHO YOU ARE

AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL

BECAUSE THOSE WHO

MATTER DON’T MIND

AND THOSE WHO MATTER

DON’T MIND

Father I pray that You will help us all to see our true beauty. I pray that we all will somehow have a yellow flat hair breakthrough this day. I pray for all of the little girls inside of us that feel they don’t quite measure up/fit in. Lord show them their tribe who will accept them as is. Expose them to those who will love their beauty as well as their ugly. I speak boldly against the spirit of depression, I pray that you will expose it loudly to the hearts of someone who loves them for we know that TRUE DEPRESSION is a quiet disease. I bind the spirit of suicide and bullying and I send it to a dry dark place where there can no longer be growth. Show all my beautiful struggling people that there is so much to live for. Lord show us our purpose so that we can find our feet and walk boldly for you. Father arrest busy single Moms where they stand and empower them to talk to their girls and show them love and compassion in a way that it overflows in the school houses all of the world.

Bless those who are unique and different, and may they multiply and be all about your business.

Be near the brokenhearted.

In Jesus Name.

Amen

Written by~April Boddie

April is a Huntsville native, who is a mother of three and a mama to many. When she was a little girl she wanted to be a race car driver. Now she races around the Tennessee Valley catering to others’ needs. The joy of the Lord is her strength, and His grace abounds in her life. April’s hope is in Christ and her heart is to serve and love. On any given day you might find her repotting plants, preparing meals and making old things new. April has a love for words and melodies. An undiscovered comedian, she finds the joy of laughter in the darkest of circumstances. Her favorite quote is “If you don’t like something change it and if you can’t change it, change your attitude.” Dr. Maya Angelou

 

3 Comments

  1. Tuamissia Taylor May 5, 2017 at 4:41 pm

    Beautiful ?

     
  2. Teresa Kirkpatrick May 6, 2017 at 1:18 am

    When my blonde hair, blue eyed daughter came home from her first day of kindergarten, which was comprised of mostly African-American girls, she wanted three pony tails like many of the other girls- one at the top right of her head, one on the left, and one in the back. I thought that was so precious, and the next day, she wore her three pony-tails with her hair sprigging out all over her, and she was happy with it.

     
  3. Barbara H. Parker May 7, 2017 at 9:42 pm

    Beautiful April, this sounds like my granddaughter Brooklynn, she has adorable hair n my opinion, but she says it’s PUFFY Lolo
    Mrs.Parker from Hidden in Him

     

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