“Enhance Your Romance” by May Patterson
Enhance Your Romance: Valentine’s Date Night Topics for Couples
We escaped—practically fled from our house—and drove off into the sunset together. Our Valentine’s date night was long overdue. After my husband and I were seated at our favorite restaurant, I almost teared up—the culture shock was overwhelming—as I gingerly ran my finger across the hemstitched linen napkin. Red roses and flickering candles adorned our table. A guitarist played softly in the corner.
We had been existing on chili-dogs and nachos on Styrofoam plates at our kids’ basketball games for over a month. A little ambiance was way overdue.
“How long has it been since we’ve had an adult conversation?” I wondered. Obviously, too long: halfway through the hors-d’oeuvres, I realized we had been talking about our kids’ sports for twenty minutes straight.
That’s when it hit me: what else did we have to talk about?
I couldn’t remember.
Somehow, romance felt kind of distant.
Where had it gone?
When my husband and I were dating, we talked for hours. We sat up late discussing ideas, dreams, and even random thoughts. We took long walks together in a little park near our college campus, never running out of things to say.
But somehow, after having three children, jobs, schoolwork and sports, the romance had . . . ebbed in the wake of daily survival.
It’s not that we didn’t love each another, but somehow the carefree feelings of romance were hard to rekindle. So, we talked about it. And this conversation has come back up often, over the years.
We’ve discovered that date nights draw our hearts closer when we avoid these romance killers:
- Children. We love them, but somehow saying, “What did the dentist say about Caroline’s tooth?” can quickly chase romance away.
- Work. “Supply costs are killing our bottom line . . .” can really break the mood.
- Extended family. “Your Aunt Edith said what?” drowns out the ambiance.
- Household chores. “You mean you didn’t fix the sink yet?” can douse the romantic fire.
Romance (making your spouse feel loved and valued) is a very important part of marriage, yet if we aren’t careful, it can get lost in the busyness of life. Maybe you can relate. We’ve been married for thirty-one years now, and I’ve finally learned that scheduling date nights and romantic occasions, such as Valentine’s Day, is essential to keeping the romance alive.
The Bible teaches us to “Love each other deeply with all your heart.” (1 Peter 1:22 NLT). This includes your spouse. God is glorified when you love him or her well. Valentine’s Day is simply an opportunity to express your love.
So what topics enhance romance?
I’ve listed 10 topics below as a guide to help you draw closer to your spouse. Place a copy of this list in a Valentine’s card and give it to your spouse early, so that he or she can think about it before you go out. Try to stay away from the romance killers I listed above. Use this guide to rekindle the romantic fire.
Topics to Enhance Romance:
1. Name 5 adjectives that describe our first date.
2. My favorite memory of our wedding day is …
3. The song that always makes me think of you is … because …
4. The funniest thing that has happened since we’ve been married is …
5. The thing I appreciate about you most is …
6. The greatest strength of our marriage is …
7. You make me feel great about myself when … How can we make each other feel like that more often?
8. My greatest need right now is…
9. If I could spend 24 hours doing anything in the world with you, it would be…
10. My favorite photo of us is the one where …
Invest in your marriage by making a special Valentine’s date with your spouse. Enjoy each other. Hold hands. Laugh, listen and love. Let this topical guide help you. Make sure your spouse knows how much you value him or her.
Mignon McLaughlin said:
“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”
For a handy printable list that includes 10 additional conversation topics to enhance your romance on Valentine’s, click here. Download and print. Slip a copy into your spouse’s Valentine’s Day card before you go out:
~ Written by May Patterson ~
May Patterson, author of the book Seeking a Familiar Face, began writing in response to God’s grace. And by His grace, she has written articles for magazines such as Focus on the Family, Crosswalk and Upper Room, and she speaks at a variety of events. Her desire is to help people draw closer to God. May is married to her dear friend Mike and they have three grown children. She has a great love for the outdoors, travel and blogging at maypatterson.com.
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